I’ve been pondering all week on what 2010 meant to me. What it meant to turn 50, how it felt to have eye opening experiences, how wonderful it is to finally have your child ready to leave home and take that first flight that I did almost 30 years ago. Not the same first flight that Alan & I took to Jamaica in September, which was awesome by any standards, but that flight out of the nest; that leap of faith that God will direct her steps and lead her to “the” person she “will” grow old with.

My 50th birthday came and went without any grand pomp or circumstance, but in September, Alan & I celebrated that milestone in grand style with an ALL-Inclusive trip to Negril, Jamaica…..not only did I take my first EVER plane ride, which by the way earned me my Wings with Delta, but it was an International flight that transported me to a magical place of “no worries” in just under 2 ½ hours.

We went and met up with a total of 10 other couples, most of which have been all over the globe and back so in the middle of this grand, one week vacation with new found & long time friends, imagine our surprise when they had voted us “the most fun” couple of the trip. WOW, we were just having that “kid in the candy store with $20” (inflation) experience. Swimming, parasailing, snorkeling, massaging, sun bathing, eating, drinking, & drinking, and OH, did I mention “drinking”. Never once did we have to lift a finger to do anything. Well, except to get our meals at the buffet dinners or breakfasts, but they would have catered to us for those too if we had asked.

So, for over half of my life, I lived in fear of flying. Fear of the unknown, fear that the plane would fall out of the sky, fear that I might die before my time….FEAR! I guess you can say that I have gotten over that fear because in this new year, 2011, I will take a Bi-plane ride over the city of Atlanta with a long time friend, wind in my hair, goggles to protect my eyes that are wide open for the next adventure.


I’ve had several “favorite” songs this past year. One in particular by Miranda Lambert, “The House that Built Me”. Many of the words of that song reminded me of the childhood I had growing up, somewhat different than most people, but my childhood just the same. I have moved on from most of those memories, but there will always be that black dog that is buried in the back yard, the countless games of marbles or Mumblety-peg with the boys in the neighborhood, the endless days of Barbie dolls and dress up with the girls across the street….the Sunday dinners that always called our names just by the drift of the wind bringing the scent of Beef Stew or Pork Roast, or even the Hamburger & Sauerkraut Casserole from Mrs. Florence’s house, which I always managed to get invited to.

The song itself tells the story of a young woman that goes back to her childhood home because she had grown up, moved on and forgot who she was. She was hoping that just by touching or feeling the old home place, that she could find herself again just by walking through, taking her old memories with her. It is my hope and prayer that Stefanie will leave home in June and take all of her good memories of this old place with her.

Memories of that orange tabby Fabian, the cool cat, buried in the back yard next to Cally, the wonder dog and Hunny Bunny, the Netherland Dwarf rabbit that quickly became “my” rabbit. Memories of all the countless camping trips in that Coleman Popup under the shed…trips to the mountains of East Tennessee, the Sugar White Beaches of Panama City and jaunts to the lake where we drifted for hours on floats that barely looked sturdy enough to hold up a child, let alone BBW (Big Beautiful Women & an average sized guy & 1 Super Fur Baby in her pink designer life jacket).

The one thing Alan & I have always told Stefanie, breathed into her and conveyed in loving fashion is that we are the two people who will ALWAYS be here for her. We taught her to be independent and always be proud of who she is and no matter where she is in life, she will always have a place to come home to.

On June 18, 2011, Alan will answer that question that so many Daddy’s are asked about their daughters, “Who gives this woman to be married to this man? ”We” do. Adam, we look forward to “officially” welcoming you into our family (& Allie…such a sweet little fur baby). Stefanie, we love you with all we have….never forget who you are.

One of the things that I have been working on this past year is my “PMA” (Positive Mental Attitude). Thomas Jefferson taught that “Nothing can stop the man with the right attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on Earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude”. You would think that someone with so many positives in her life could easily stay on task with this assignment. I beg to differ though, it is very hard when you have the “negative” (NMA) forces around you. I have to be careful when treading this subject, I don’t want to cause friction and certainly don’t want any “unwanted” negatives flying aimlessly at me.

I will say that on this day, 1-1-11, I received an email from an old friend that does put some of the negative in a different view for me. I would like to share a portion of that email with you, it is my hope and prayer that I can apply what I have read to better help me understand at least some of that “NMA”:

Blessed In Aging
~Esther Mary Walker
Blessed are they who understand
My faltering step and shaking hand
Blessed, who know my ears today
Must strain to hear the things they say.
Blessed are those who seem to know
My eyes are dim and my mind is slow
Blessed are those who look away
When I spilled tea that weary day.
Blessed are they who, with cheery smile
Stopped to chat for a little while
Blessed are they who know the way
To bring back memories of yesterday.
Blessed are those who never say
“You’ve told that story twice today”
Blessed are they who make it known
That I am loved, respected and not alone.
And blessed are they who will ease the days
Of my journey home, in loving ways.
This poem, as read by Mary Maxwell in the video “A Reminder That Laughter is the Best Medicine.”View the video online at CaregiverStress.com

To the ones who have remembered me in prayer, as I tend to her with loving care. I thank you for the love you’ve shown & let me vent until the cows came home. And though it seems like I can’t let go, I only have my attitude to show, just how much she means to me so today, I’m going to let it be…..I love you Dahling.

I can’t let 2010 come to a close without giving a very special shout out to “my girls”. I feel so very blessed to have not only one group of very special ladies in my life, but two. Neither group has anything to do with the other, yet they both bring so much of what is good and beautiful and right with the world. I don’t know what I’d do without each and every one of you, you all know who you are and just what you mean to me. I thank God every day for your friendship…here’s to many more memories in 2011.

It wouldn’t be right to reflect on the year without mentioning my sweet little Bunni Boo. Each day is like a new adventure with her. She makes me laugh out loud every day and you know what they say, “laughter IS the best medicine”. I can only hope that 2011 will be another great year of making memories with our little brown fur baby. I now have another favorite quote in regards to Bunni: “Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened.” Like I always say, “After all, dog spelled backwards is God.”

On March 28, 2011, Alan and I will celebrate our 30th Wedding Anniversary. It has been a great journey so far, one I wouldn’t trade for all the tea in China. It’s wonderful being married to your bestest friend in the Whole Wide World. I never would have dreamed that 2010 would hold so many wonderful memories for the two of us. I mean, how can you top the 28 years we already had under our belt.

It seems like yesterday that we were exchanging our “I do’s” and starting our memory catalog, but once again, as it has been throughout our marriage, this past year has been one of the best yet. From being with our daughter on the night that her Fiancé proposed to her, to making new friends in Jamaica, to catching up and getting reacquainted with old school friends….it will be hard to beat 2010, but I look forward to the challenge…..I love you Alan, you know how far :)

In closing, I can’t forget all the great friends I have reconnected with because of Face Book. From the late night chats, the pokes, the prayers, the encouraging words of so many of you, a simple Thank you just doesn’t seem to be appropriate. I would like to borrow from the status of my friend, Cindi Wallace Ray from Friday Morning, December 31, 2010:

May all of your needs, hopes, dreams and wishes be fulfilled, may your mornings begin with smiles and gratitude, may your days be happy, productive and filled with joy, abundance and prosperity, may your evenings have quiet moments of reflection that remind you what a remarkable person you are. “You” are exceptional and relevant to those around you and most of all…I wish you LOVE!

I can hardly wait to see what 2011 has in store for all of us…..Hooooooooty Hoooooooooooo to all of you ;)